Tuesday, November 24, 2009

trying to make a positive when you feel so negative;

so i havent written in this for a while.  weird thing is quite a bit has actually been going on, i just havent felt like writing about it.  maybe one day but not right now.  i am just thankful for my amazing family, and good friends like alisha & joe, and natalie.

life is a roller coaster, and i'm just waiting and hoping for another up...

untill then i am going to keep this minimal.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

enter galactic love connection;

so, i got my car to work today.  finally.  but of course every simple little thing w my car is and all day adventure.  i think i got about an hour of sleep last night.  by the time i could fall asleep my phone was ringing off the hook.

tomorrow i am getting a temporary phone to use since my main one is shut off cause i'm broke.  my mom has an extra line i can use, but its not blackberry.  but at least i will be able to call and txt so that is good.

not going to lmfao tomorrow.  bummer.  but whatever.  i guess i might be going to warren miller on friday.  and then i need to figure out when i am going to leave for idaho.  im guessing monday at the latest.  but i have to check the passes.

loving the new kid cudi cd.  and lala.com since you can listen to like everything for free.  its great.

welllll i am bored of this already.  so so so excited for xmas when my sister comes home.  christmas break is fun fun fun.  byebye now.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

how i know i'm not an "adult" yet;

no one ever said life would be easy, no one said it would be this hard;

so, i need to decide if i want to move back to love w my parents, or stay in oly.  its basically either follow my head or follow my heart.

i think i will be able to find a job in idaho, and save, and then get my life back on track and eventually save enough to move to idaho.

or i can stay in oly and keep trying to find a job even though i am starting to doubt i ever will, and be w ricky.  but we fight so much because i have no job, and half the time i want to go back home because we arent getting along.

but i mean what if i cant find a job in idaho.  then i would be over there, missing ricky, and still not working.  i just WANT A JOB!  but i guess honestly even if i find a job here in oly i will eventually have to move out and pay rent which will suck.  i just want to save so i can move where i really want to live instead of wasting my youth living somewhere that i cant seem to leave but never understand why.  yah i love it here, but its like just because its easy because i grew up.  time to start a new chapter.  time to be an adult.

i am so confused right now and i feel like everything has been so hard lately.  i think i just need to go to idaho, clear my head, be w family, try my very hardest to get a job, and see how it goes.  i know i dont have a problem w long distance relationships and i guess what is meant to be will be.  if he really really loves me he wont have a problem w it either and maybe its the test we need to take to see if we should even be together.

i just hate being faced w these decisions that are so life changing and so hard.  but i think something always points me in the right direction and i always make the right choice.  and maybe when i dont make the right choice it was because i was supposed to learn a very important lesson that helps me in the future.

i KNOW everything happens for a reason, and i think i just need to go with what i feel is right.  right now i am leaning towards idaho.  i want a job so bad, and i think if i really really try i will find one.  i mean i'll have to because i will have no other option.

uhg.  stressful.  i hate stress. but i think usually after every really bad time there comes a really good time.  if there were no bad times then we wouldnt appreciate how good, the good times are.  so thats that.  my life and thought for today.

on another note, call of duty came out today at like midnight.  ricky will probably be downstairs playing it untill all hours of the morning.  but whatever, i usually cant fall asleep till its light outside anway, really need to change that.

okay well i wrote more than i ever usually do so i am done.  dont forget that you can always leave comments, you dont have to sign in or anything, anyone can comment.  thats all :)

Monday, November 9, 2009

whatever you like;

obsessed w this remake by anya marina of t.i.'s 'whatever you like'.  you can listen to it here on lala.com

it was featured on tonights episode of gossip girl.

never gooddd enough;

so i always redo my heading, and i always love it at first, and then end up hating it a few days later.  i need to come up w like a logo or something.  i am such a terrible artist though and i dont have any good programs on the computer so it makes it hard.

i also havent made any sets in a while.  blah, havent felt very inspired lately.  i need to get out!  i think i just need to get out of this town.  i am feeling so over it right now.  i kinda just want to go back home to idaho.  and then ACTUALLY find a job, and save up for like a year and FINALLY move to la for good.  i feel like i am just wasting time right now, and you only live once.  i dont want to look back on my life and say, "wow i wish i would have done more when i was young."

i NEED to get my life together.  but its just been so effing hard for some reason.  uhg well i am done complaining. blahh.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

cherry cherry boom boom;

super excited!  going to LMFAO, Shwayze, FM, Paradiso Girls, & Space Cowboy concert on thursday!

Falling Down - Space Cowboy ft. Paradiso Girls: listen obsessed.  (Space Cowboy is Lady Gaga's dj listen)

Get U Home - Shwayze: listen

LMFAO - La La La: listen lovvve this song.  i want to dress like they do in the video!

FM - Lowridin: listen this song is kinda old but i really love it, their new song is "Girls On the Dance Floor"

Saturday, November 7, 2009


okay, so one thing i love love love is music.  so i put a bunch of NEW music on the side to check out and i am going to write a little review on each song letting you know what i think.  also there are a few songs i like that i couldnt find on iLike so i will give links to them also. here we go:

somebody to love - leighton meester ft robin thicke:  love this song.  i think leighton is great, hope the rest of her album is as good.

say something - drake ft. timbaland:  love this.  drake is awesome, timbaland is always good in my book.

do you remember - jay sean ft sean paul & lil jon:  mmm, average.  jay sean is kinda catchy but boring, and i am not a fan of lil jon.

spotlight - usher ft guccie mane: ehh, i am not all the into usher anymore but i think this song might grow on me.

morning after dark - nelly furtado ft timbaland: LOVE THEM, i like this song, i think it will grow on me alot more though.

i invented sex - trey songz ft drake:  not a fan.

everything, everyday, everywhere - fabolous ft keri hilson: i love love love this song.  keri hilson is awesommme!  (right now i accidentally picked the intrumental version but i will try and fix that soon.)

goodmorning - chamillionaire: ehh, i'm not sure yet.  its alright i guess.

gotta get it - juvenile: couldnt really tell what the real version was cause there were a few.  ehh, its whatever, nothing special.

right here - erk the jerk:  i actually really like this song for a slow one.

i look good - chalie boy: nothing special.

gangsta luv - snoop ft the dream: like it, i do love the dream.

i'm still fly - drake: its a remake, but i like it.  drake is good.

in ya phone - treyz songs: i actually really like this, only treyz songs i like so far.

throw it in the bag - fabolous: not new, but at first i hated this song and now i lovvve it.  but its one of those dumb radio songs.

written on her - birdman: ehh, its alright, it will get old quick.

memories - david guetto ft kid cudi:  i like it...but i wouldnt want to listen to it over and over.

meet me halfway - black eyed peas: i like it, its different, i think it will grow on me.
thats it for whats on the side...nothing that i am all the impressed with except for the new leighton meester song.  these i like:

dr hollywood - 69 chevy: listen i love this song, dr hollywood is awesome.

how low - ludacris: listen ehhh, not a luda fan.  dont think this is great.

hard - rihanna: listen i am sadly not that into her new album.

90210 - wale: listen in LOVE LOVE LOVE w this song!

i get money - kevin cossom ft drake: listen i LOVEEE this song also.

lights please - j. cole:  listen i like this song alot, not radio crappp that i am sick of.


my baby brother is SEVEN today!  i can't believe it.  i am so so so sad i can't be there on his birthday :(  i miss him so much.  so here are some pictures of him about two years ago, he is such a baby in these!

awww isnt he cute?!  i love this kid more than anything.  i cant wait to see him hopefully over christmas break.  hope you are having an amazing 7th birthday baby!

glad to be out of the drama!

which sadly, doesnt make for a very interesting blog.  haha.  but i would rather thing thing not be filled w useless drama and be filled w more useful information.  so i will try and blog about some things i am interested in.  i havent felt like taking the time lately and i havent really come up w anything great.  i found those awesome old pics and that was about enough for me for a while.

anyway, it is holiday season so i am sure things will be more interesting soon.  and it will have nothing to do w/ drama.

oh one thing i have decided for certain; i like never want to live w roommates again.  i just want to live on my own!  or with my family :)  because roommate situations always turn out shitty because people in this world are far too selfish and imature.  sadly, i dont think anyone ever grows up and gets ovvvver the drama.

sooo, i just really need to find a good job so i can afford to live on my own.  i am just really over living in olympia.  i am sure i would miss it alot if i moved away, but i know i need a change.  and to really get on w my life.  its just too bad that to do that it takes money.  everything takes money, and there is no money right now because we live in the shitty usa.

okay well i am done ranting for now.  next blog: useful, interesting, information!! :)  goodnight.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

last but not least [LAUGHABLE!]

HAHA halloween 2005, when i was a senior in high school.  i was "bitch barbie" and lene was "whore barbie" i think.  i wish i had more pictures that were better.  i loved my blonde hair, i wanna go back!

gi joe & army hoe.

these were all my roommates from santa barbara.  when we had a g.i. joe & army hoe party.  i just found all these old pictures and decided to call today "LETS PLAY DRESS UP".  i should have done this BEFORE halloween i guess, but since everyones got all their new halloween pictures up i figure why not! :)

my barbie going away party;

these are from a very long time ago.  the summer after i graduated when i lived in santa barbara for a month.  my going away party was barbie themed!  i was princess barbie.  amanda & christie w me.

halloween 2006;

baby rhiannon;

me and my little sister when we were young.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

twenty five things about me;

1. Beauty & the Beast is my all time favorite movie. Always has been, always will be. I remember seeing it in the theater when i was little and think it's a beautiful story.

2. I absolutely love to work out, running and yoga are my favorites. Running makes me extremely happy, and yoga calms, destresses and keeps me centered.

3. I am completely obsessed with music. I can sit online & on iTunes for days just looking up new music and making new playlists.

4. I've been a vegitarian now for over a year. My parents always have been, and i've tried a few times before but havent lasted. I am so proud of myself.

5. Four is my favorite number, its the only number that has the same number of letters when spelled out as the number it's spelling out.

6. Every song reminds me of a different time or person in my life.

7. It took me a long time, but i have finally realized that family is the most important thing in the world. I would be no one with out mine and i love them more than anything.

8. I truely believe that everything happens for a reason.

9. Most of the time i feel like i don't have any close friends. I think i rarely share my actual feelings with anyone because of this.

10. My bed is my favorite place in the whole world.

11. When i grow up i want to move to L.A. and become famous, or start my own spa, work for a big cosmetic company, or write for a magazine.

12. If i had to chose a last meal, with out a doubt it would be my moms smoked salmon w asparagus.

13. I find new places fascinating.

14. I love pictures, they difinitely say a thousands words.

15. My little brother Joe can make me happy any time, any place.

16. I'm not scared of getting older because i live every day to the fullest.

17. I think success makes guys more attractive, and i'm not sure that is a good thing.

18. I am the oldest of five sibblings. I'm also all of my grandparents first grandchild.

19. I'm the only person i know that has a "favorite" day that isnt their birthday or a holiday. Mine is October 4th.

20. I am NOT named after the Fleetwood Mac song "Rhiannon" but it is one of my favorite songs, and favorite bands. I was actually named after the Celtic goddess Rhiannon, look her up, she has an interesting story.

21. I try to be nice to everyone i meet. I don't think there is any reason to be rude or to judge people. I know that everyone is different and that is what makes the world an interesting place.

22. I never feel jealous, awkward or embarrassed. I believe that there is no use for those emotions and have learned to block them out.

23. I wont drink water unless its out of a 30 oz. water bottle. And i try and drink at least two a day.

24. I think that life is what you make it and always try to look on the bright side. I try really hard to never take anything for granted.

25. I love to fall asleep to my sister playing the piano, even though i havent had the chance to in a long time.

halloween pics;

chey, some crazy pop star, me and ash on halloween (night one)

us again, on actual halloween night; this is like THE ONLY pic of me, ha.  but you can kinda see my bunny ears! :)

far too late to be awake;

sooo, it is like four in the morning and i am still awake for some dumb reason.  blahh.  i think the only thing that makes me not an owl is having a job and since i don't have one of those right now then there is nothing stopping me.

so sadly, halloween is over! :(  very sad, but i had a pretty good one.  friday night i went out w ash and chey and we got all dressed up and went to a party for a little while, and then went downtown, and no one was dressed up but us. haha.  it was fun though because we took alot of pictures and people kept asking to take pictures w us.  i borrowed a costume from chey and was "rhinestone cowgirl" haha.  it was cute.  hopefully i will have some picutres some time soon.

then saturday night i went out w natalie, cara and des.  i just bought some bunny ears and wore black and called it good.  i reallllly wanted to be lady gaga, i got a wig but ended up pretty much hating it because it looked so fake, and i couldnt pull the rest of the costume together in time.  so maybe next year.  or maybe for something else.  there were like a million things i wanted to be and i have lots of ideas for next year!

welll anyway, we went to a pretty fun party, and then went downtown, and then i ended up at some after party w ash and chey...kinda a crazy night...but i fell off a porch onto my back and i dont really remember it hurting then but it hurts sooo bad now i can like barely walk or move.

well i guess that is pretty much it.  little joe turns 7 this weekend and i REALLLY wish i could be there for that!  he is growing up sooo fast.  i miss him, and all my family, like crazy.

but anyway i am tired and sick of being on the computer so that is all for now! :) goodnight/goodmorning!